Monday, January 30, 2012

And the Winner Is....

An infection!  We have never been so excited about having an infection BUT we are ecstatic.  I may have an addiction to sarcasm but this is genuine happiness regarding this news.  It is temporary.  It is treatable. It is not contagious.  It is an answer.  The infection explains his body aches (he has been in constant pain and unable to get comfortable) and overall feeling of cruddiness (yes, I make up my own words and no, you never want to play scrabble with me).  Now, it is not a simple run-of-the mill, sinus type infection.  Nope.  It is an infection of his prostate.  What does this mean?  Well, first it means Jeff gets to the experience the joy of me blogging to the entire world about his prostate.  Secondly, it means it feels like he is peeing razor blades every time he uses the bathroom.  Hey, I've warned up before, if you read this blog, you are going to get updates on Jeff - the good, the bad, the "not dinner table appropriate".  Fortunately, if you know Jeff, it is nearly IMPOSSIBLE to embarrass him. Trust me, I try to no avail to embarass him on a daily basis.  We've been keeping a video diary of our journey and there are some great embarassing moments on there that you "might" be lucky enough to see once we reach the end of this road.

Jeff is anemic which also explains his extreme fatigue.  This too is temporary and treatable.

We now have a new specialist to join our medical bills , I mean medical team helping Jeff back to good health and monitor the infection.

Thank you for continued prayers.  Please pray for Jeff's pain to go away, this is the hardest part for me to watch.

Mentally, we are doing well.  Jeff wanted to be strong enough to take Kenzie to a Father/Daughter banquet this weekend and has been a little down about missing the event.  Yet, we are thankful he will be around in the future for many more banquets.  Brayden and I might just have to recreate our own banquet for them here at home.  Those of you who are our facebook friends know our dogs have been sequestered to the basement since Jeff's surgery.  Well, you will be happy to know we have allowed them a few minutes of freedom upstairs with us this evening.  As you can see, they are eager to join Jeff with his exercise on the treadmill....




Jeff is ready to get things moving, get stronger and start the rehab phase once he jumps this last mini hurdle.  We are confident the next few months are going to be great!!  The goal for the end of this week is to complete 3 x 10 minute walks in one day.  Good friends sacrificed their backs and dragged our treadmill up from the basement and it is beautifully displayed next to the dining room table.  It is not HGTV design worthy but it is Get Your Heart Pumpin' worthy.  Tomorrow is exciting because Jeff hasn't been allowed outside unless the temperature is above 47 degrees and tomorrow it's going to bust up to a blazing 63 degrees!  We have goals to reach the mailbox and maybe a few circles in the driveway.  Watch out Springfield, IL!

In the midst of all we have going on, there are SO MANY fighting difficult battles, some well known, some silently.  Please take a moment to lift those up in your life who are experience hardships.  Pray for those who may be dealing with a somber season in the their life, you may not know them by name, but God does and he listens.  Keep your eyes open this week for opportunities to reach out to others.  Remember the smallest acts of kindness or encouraging words can go a LONG WAY and make a BIG DIFFERENCE.  Never underestimate the impact you can make in this world.  



GOD IS GOOD!!!!!!!  ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!!!!

-Stacy and Jeff

Friday, January 27, 2012

While We Wait...

Many of you have been asking us about the results of Jeff's tests.  The results did not get back to the office in time for the doctor to read them.  We were told we will have to wait until Monday for answers.  But when we wait, we grow closer to God.   It's ALWAYS a good thing when you are growing closer to God, therefore, waiting for answers until Monday just became a good thing.  :-)


GOD IS GOOD!!!!!  ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!


-Jeff and Stacy

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Gratitude





The first few days at home have been rough but our spirits remain good.  Jeff has to go for a few tests tomorrow.  It is not unexpected to have some extra difficulties after open heart surgery.  We have to keep in perspective everything Jeff's body has gone through the past couple weeks.   Please continue to pray for Jeff's recovery.

Through all of this we have been amazed by the generosity of others.  Family, friends, co-workers, church family and those who are complete strangers.  Today, the giving spirit of these people literally brought us to our knees thanking God for his provision.  Tears of joy and amazement flowed freely from both of us.  God's timing is perfect.

On our behalf, people have made many sacrifices, they have sacrificed finances, taken time out of their day to visit with us, cook us a meal, or run errands.  My co-workers have given up vacation time to cover for me while I was up at the hospital with Jeff and are putting in extra hours to take care of my work load.  People have welcomed our children into their homes, taken them to birthday parties, helped them with homework, kept them overnight and transported them to and from school.  We even had die hard Brewers fans offer to fulfill a present we bought for Brayden's birthday, subjecting themselves to 2 days of Cardinals Mania down in St. Louis and the most painful part...wearing a Cardinals badge around their Milwaukee lovin' neck (still waiting to post pictures of that one).

Then, there is the generosity and caring of all those at Memorial Medical Center who took care of Jeff.  We cannot rave about the medical and support staff enough.  They saved Jeff's life.  The gave Brayden and Kenzie their dad back.  They gave me my husband and best friend back.  They went above and beyond to make sure our needs were being met, even bringing me extra blankets and pillows on the nights I slept in the waiting room.  And when we did have a concern, they responded in a big way.

We want to take this time to say a big THANK YOU.  We may have said it before and we might say it again, but we cannot express enough the positive impact you have made in the lives of Jeff and I and our children.  Impact that will be long lasting.  

As we left the hospital Sunday night, instantly the verse from Matthew came to us and we left it behind on Jeff's dry erase board.  This is a verse our family strives to live by on a daily basis.  It became our focus last June when we went on a Family Mission Trip to Springfield and Joplin, MO.  Each morning of the mission trip, we were given a devotion and a verse to talk about with our family.  Jeff and I had to return to Springfield 2 days earlier than the rest of the group because of my work schedule.  Brayden choose to stay behind with the group, most of which he had never met before the trip.  We did a devotion with Brayden the morning  before we left.  He was headed to Joplin, MO to assist with tornado relief.  The verse from that day was from Matthew 25:45, "Whatever you did for the least of these, my brothers and sisters, you did for me".  This verse is true for all of you who have taken care of us thus far, for those of you who expressed desire to assist our family in the coming months and for all who have prayed for our family.  This is God speaking to YOU.  You see, you weren't just generous with us, you were generous with God.  You have made Him proud by honoring one of His commands:


We will keep you updated on the results of Jeff's tests.  Once we get over this unexpected post-surgical hurdle, Jeff should be able to start Cardiac rehab and get back on the normal course of treatment.  

GOD IS GOOD!!!!!   ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!!!!!

-Stacy

Sunday, January 22, 2012

A Picture Says a Thousand Words....

Home SWEET Home

YOU DID IT!!  YOU NEVER CEASED WITH YOUR PRAYERS AND YOU HELPED BRING JEFF HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


It happened very quickly.  I know I said yesterday we hoped Kenzie would hug her dad real soon but "God is Good" and today she saw him for this first time since last Sunday, and she was able to hug him in our living room!!!


We know we have a long road to recovery ahead.  As the doctor said, when referring to our darker day Wednesday, "you don't want to win the battle and lose the war".   We are thankful for God's hand through this trial.  Jeff said, "although it wasn't pleasant and more hard work is ahead, if I had a chance to do it all over again, I would tell God 'Yes!' in a heartbeat."  (no pun intended)


We love all of you.  We hope you will continue to join us on our journey into this next phase.  We may not be updating as often, although Jeff does have a list of "tips" for hospital survival to share with you.  I'm sure you will be on the edge of your seats waiting for that in depth perspective.  However, in the meantime, we are going to take time to enjoy being home together as a family of four after spending SIXTEEN roller coaster days in the hospital.  


We still are not allowed visitors, as Jeff is at high risk for developing an infection.  Once his doctor lifts this restriction, we will let you know. 


Thanks again!


God is Good!!!!!! ALL the time!!!!!!!!!!


-Stacy

Saturday, January 21, 2012

A Big Surprise!

So we have something great to tell you.  No, Jeff isn't going home today.  The BIG surprise will be revealed in this post but you have to keep reading.  And no cheating by scrolling down to the end, because we are one step ahead of you and just might sneak it in somewhere in the middle.

Jeff is continuing to improve.  He is continuing to get stronger and has had the best day thus far!


His kidney lab values have improved.  His blood levels are low and he is getting a blood transfusion at this moment.  We are going to wait on letting Kenzie visit but we are confident she'll be able to hug her dad real soon.

The spikes in Jeff's energy levels are lasting longer but are followed by brief moments of extreme fatigue.  We are continuing to celebrate walking further (although with assist of a wheeled walker).  Jeff wants to make use of his current state of alertness to relay something very dear to his heart and something he feels strongly about.... church.  Now, don't stop reading when you hear that word.  Remember, you have to hang in there for the big surprise!

We never could not have made it through this trial while still feeling complete peace, strength, good humor and positive attitude if it wasn't for God AND for our church.  It bothers Jeff when he hears people say they don't go to church because of one bad experience or because of "hearing" about bad experiences from others.  Yes, sadly, there are some churches created by and led by groups of people for dishonest reasons.  Yes, there are some people who visit churches for the wrong reasons.  Most importantly, and don't miss this truth: Yes, EVERYONE who goes to church is imperfect, sins and some can listen to a sermon about avoiding a particular sin and then once again succumb to it.  Two of those people I just described are currently writing this blog.  Does this mean all church goers are hypocrites? NO.

When Jeff and I joined our current church, we admitted we are not perfect, we sin and Jesus died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sins so we can live together in heaven, a place designed by God just how he truly meant this world to be:  No sorrow, No Pain, No Fear, No Clogged up Heart Vessels, No Broken Kidneys... Perfect.  We are EXTREMELY grateful for this gift of everlasting life.  THAT is why we go to church.  We want to give back and let God know how much we appreciate all he has currently given to us, as well as the wonderful future gift of heaven that was FREELY granted us.  We go to church because it is what the bible commands us to do.  We go to church because we are bombarded with "things of this world" everywhere we turn and we need guidance, accountability and to be challenged on how to navigate and keep our eyes upward.  One hour a week is such a small, small sacrifice on our part compared to what HE has sacrificed for us.

We just spent time in prayer for YOU.  We prayed for each person that will read this blog.  We pray you will consider, if you don't already have a church home, seeking one out.  We are absolutely in LOVE with our current church, Westside Christian Church, in Springfield, IL.  The people are outstanding, friendly, welcoming and sincerely care about one another inside the church as well as loving on others outside the church walls.   It doesn't matter your background, your race, your income level, your social status, or your length of time being a member of the church....  ALL who enter the walls of WSCC are equal.  The leadership of our church have a genuine and authentic passion for following God's word and reaching God's people.   Yes, our church is large.  It is large because it is healthy and growing, not because it focuses on how many people it can jam in the door each week.  Technically, unless EVERY person on this earth is actively attending a church each Sunday, then ALL churches should be growing.  Seeing a church expanding it's walls should be something to celebrate, instead of criticize.  Westside is not in competition with churches, but instead partners with them, both close to home and internationally, to help seek and save the broken and hurting.  There are MANY great churches in our city and across this nation.  It is our hope that you can find a church that blesses your life as much as Westside has blessed ours.

So there you have it.... that is the surprise.... did you catch it?  If not, just keep rereading.  :)

God is Good!!!!!!!!  ALL the time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, January 20, 2012

Baby, Baby, Baby...

You want today's update?  Are you sure?  There was nothing poetic or Hallmark card worthy about today, but it has never had us so excited.  You might laugh... at Jeff's expense... but I doubt you cry.  Just make sure you are not eating and then proceed with caution..........

It's been like having a newborn all over again.  Celebrating lots of milestones today... the first time Jeff spoke in a complete sentence, first time feeding himself, first time walking without holding on to something, first bowel movement.  And speaking of bowel movements, ONLY Jeff would ask the nurse if she would call the hospital operator and have the lullaby played over the hospital intercom after his monumental BM.  He became disappointed when she couldn't and he now wants to petition for the creation of a special "1st Bowel Movement" song to play throughout the hospital to celebrate this milestone for all patients.  He claims it is a trend that will spread quickly across hospitals throughout the nation.  He wants a special meeting with his "pal", Ed Curtis, CEO of Memorial, to discuss this important matter leading to a "Great Patient Experience".  :) 

Our biggest milestone:  Jeff can now pee in the potty and is no longer attached to any tubes!  He accomplished "Mission Pee in Potty" with minutes to spare tonight before the time deadline.  If he didn't meet the deadline, they were going to bring back the urology crew to "re-tube".   The thought of that just scared it right out of him.  

His energy level has improved along with his spunky-witty sense of humor I've been missing so badly.  He is still a confused mess.  He insists Steve Carell came in and signed an oath saying he would keep Jeff alive, no matter what it took.  He remembers the morning of surgery, the ICU and Tuesday but he has no recollection of Wednesday afternoon.  The last thing Jeff does remember about Wednesday morning did really occur and is pretty funny (in "hind"sight), but not blog appropriate.  He also remembers the first person he saw when he opened his eyes Wednesday.  Unfortunately, it wasn't like the movies and it wasn't me.  But I'm OK with that ... because it was someone Jeff really looks up to and admires, which makes it pretty cool.  

Jeff needs to preserve the energy he has gained and use it for his walks, breathing exercises and eating .... so he still has to wait on having visitors.  We do plan for Kenzie to come see him for the first time tomorrow.  This will give him an extra boost of motivation.  Brayden was able to see him briefly last night to watch the Blues game but Jeff was pretty wiped out by that point and was sleeping so Brayden is excited to see the "real" Jeff tomorrow.  

Jeff wants to reiterate how thankful he is for your prayers.

God is Good!!!!!!!   All the time!!!!!!!!!

-Stacy (with a little dash of Jeff)


Thursday, January 19, 2012

The Power of Prayer

I'm going to start with the end of the story FIRST:  Right now, I am sitting in Jeff's room typing this blog  and Jeff is sleeping in a chair but only AFTER he finished walking down the hallway, AFTER he said good-bye to THREE chest tubes and AFTER he joked around with me.  Today has been a day of successes and victories.

Sometime it feels like Satan is saying, "Really Stacy?  Is that all you got, really?  You call that being strong?  Well, let's see how things go after this curveball?"

That is what yesterday was:  a curveball.  Yesterday morning, Jeff was still pretty lethargic, but he was mumbling more which made me happy.  I went to down to get a late breakfast while the urology crew were doing their thing.  Just a tip: always leave the room when the urology crew is doing their thing. You see, urine is important.  When you don't have urine output, things are not good.  The urology crew decided they would go in after it, but despite the call to the plumber, there was nothing.  Then came the words I didn't want to hear, "his kidneys are not working and we need to figure out why"  The rest of the day was a blur, they stripped Jeff off pain medicine to see if it would change things.  It didn't.  We went for tests and with each hour,  Jeff kept getting less alert.  By late afternoon, he wouldn't open his eyes for me, the mumbling was silent, he wouldn't eat and had zero color.    This is when, if you had a prayer-o-meter, then I think (from what I have heard from others) the meter would have been off the charts.   I was not aware at that moment of the large number of people, including some we have never met, who were praying specifically for Jeff's kidneys and his recovery.   What I did know at that time was Jeff started to improve.  At about 6 pm, we had someone who came to pray with us.  Jeff opened his eyes, he mumbled again and even managed a half smile by the end of that visit.  Jesus was there... he never left our side.

Do you believe in the power of prayer?  I always answered quickly to that, "Yes".  I pray.  I pray for others.  I believe in the power of prayer.  Well, wait a minute.   Was I only believing that God listened but deep down did I think that my prayer REALLY made a difference in the outcome of someone else's life?  Did I truly believe if NO ONE prayed for Jeff, then the incredible recovery in this past 24 hours would not have taken place?  Because, if I authentically believe in prayer, then it was NOT A coincidence that Jeff's turn around occured at the same time hundreds of people were fervently in prayer on his behalf.   I realized, I am quick to thank God for answering prayer when things improve, quick to pray to God for comfort when they don't go the way I want them to go, but never really take the time to truly appreciate the POWER of Prayer.  If you think Jeff's recovery has no influence from prayers, then there would be no point in praying for him.  But they do.  God listens.  Prayer matters.  So when I say, "thank you for the prayers".  It sounds so cliche, but means so much.  You are contributing to his recovery.  The greater the challenge, the bigger the victory.  The darker things are, the more brightly God's light can shine.

I went home to see Brayden last night.  A poster board filled with scripture had snuck it's way into our house.  Brayden loved reading each one out loud and then comparing it with the translation in his Adventure Bible.  There was a certain verse that stuck with him.  He said, "Ahhh, I just love this verse, it's amazing".  His love for The Word was genuine and he proceeded to repeat the last part of this verse over and over...




Did you read that?  ALL things... everything from yesterday, everything from today and everything we face tomorrow.

So here is the plan:  Jeff is fighting.  He needs to start eating, he needs to keep walking, he needs to keep using his teddy bear to help him cough and he needs those kidneys do their job.  Thank you for the prayers.



God is Good!!!!!!!!!  ALL the time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Stacy

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Quick Update

This is going to be just a quick update and BIG thank you for prayers.

Jeff is out of ICU. He has yet to "wake" up and talk to me. I am being patient and know each day gets better. It is only 3 am right now so this is the time he is SUPPOSED to be sleeping. In a few hours from now, it will be a different story. Today begins the rehab and it will not be easy for Jeff. Pray for Jeff's strength, his pain, his breathing and for his new partners... the Cardiac rehab team.

Jeff still cannot have visitors. Thanks for your understanding.

I may not get a chance to update for awhile so don't be alarmed. I am actually getting used to sleeping in a chair and I'm just happy to be by Jeff's side.

Thank you!!!! Thank you!!!! Thank you for the prayers and words of encouragement.

God is good!!!!! All the time!!!!!!!


-Stacy

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Perfect Peace

Sorry, I wasn't able to update you sooner.  Jeff's surgery went well....really well!!  Praise God!!  He ended up only needing a quadruple bypass instead of quintuple.  Apparently, since we had our heart broken by the #5 on December 8th when a certain person left for the Angels in California, God didn't want Jeff to have to be burdened by that number.  ;)


Jeff's vent had to be kept on longer than expected.  He had trouble with bleeding (this was one of the complications we had be warned about due to his blood thinners).  They called the surgeon who completed his stent surgeries as a precaution and they needed to leave him on the vent in case he was to need to return to surgery.  Many, many prayers were lifted up and the bleeding has slowed and Jeff is now off the vent.  It will still be awhile before Jeff can have any visitors.


I am being patient and letting the nurses do their job.  Jeff opens his eyes every once in awhile for a brief moment and it gives me butterflies each time.  He has muttered a few words but it is difficult for him to talk at this point.   One of the times in the night when I checked on him, he pointed toward the TV and mumbled "Blues" before falling back asleep.  I told him this morning that his St. Louis Blues won last night and are in 1st place since the first time since January 2000 and I received the most beautiful half crooked smile from him.  


Today's prayer request is for Jeff's pain and bleeding to be controlled.  He is having difficulty with the breathing which is just part the normal surface on this road we are traveling along.   I was telling a friend of mine that I just want to hit the fast forward button and speed up to the part where I get to have my jovial, jokester back at home with me.  I hate watching him in the ICU just shaking in pain, crying out for ice and being told by the nurse that I'm not allowed to give him any.  It is pure torture.  But if I was able to fast forward, I would miss out on the opportunity to see what God is teaching me.  So I have to learn to embrace this day, this trial and make the most of every moment, whether easy or hard, good or bad.  


In the night, when Jeff was having his trouble and the possibility of returning to surgery was mentioned, I felt amazing peace.  Early this morning a friend pointed me toward the song by Matt Redman, "Never Once".  This song is a perfect anthem for this trial:

Click Here for Jeff's Anthem... "Never Once" Matt Redman

Standing on this mountaintop
Looking just how far we’ve come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us

Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful


Carried by Your constant grace
Held within Your perfect peace
Never once, no, we never walk alone

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Every step we are breathing in Your grace
Evermore we’ll be breathing out Your praise




God is Good!!!!!  All the time!!!!!


-Stacy

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Heading into the next chapter

Mixed range of emotions flowing out of this hospital room the past 24 hours.  At the end of each shift change, it becomes time to say goodbye.  We are on Day 9 here and unlike previous shift changes this week, Jeff doesn't get to work with this staff when they clock back in next time. They have been like our family and therefore some tears have been shed.  They have all promised to come see him in the hospital after surgery.   He is still hoping there is a way he can talk them into letting him come back to this unit after surgery.  However, we have heard great things about the staff on the other side of the floor and know God has great things in store for us in our new neighborhood next week.  Here are a few pics from the last week:















We are moving on to the next chapter and must leave the familiarity of our current environment.  We are giving God praise for keeping him free of blood clots this week.  This is a specific prayer request we know many of you having being praying on our behalf.  Speaking of prayer praises....drum roll please........... I have a REAL recliner!!!!   Woooo-hoooo!  I don't know if Jeff and I will sleep much tonight but at least we will both be comfy. :)

Now we go on to face a new battle and fight a tougher fight.   To say that we have not had moments of fear, would be a lie.   We are not living in denial of the reality of our situation.  We know the risks and struggles ahead.  Yet, we also know we are not alone.  We have God and an army of prayer warriors on our side.  I received a bright green envelope in the mail with instructions to open it up and pick out one card each day until they were all gone.  Today, during a wave of anxiety, I went to get the envelope and pulled out a card for the first time.  I reached in and choose one from the middle.  On the card was hand written, "When I am afraid, I will trust in You"  Psalm 56:3.   God never ceases to AMAZE us with His timing.  We had to pack up some things and therefore we erased the target on the dry erase board.  But having a blank 'Plan for the Day' wasn't working for us....so we filled it in:




Thank you to all who signed up to for "Operation Pray Jeff Thru"  We were overwhelmed when we saw the list of names and you have no idea what it means to us to know you have sacrificed this time.  If you signed up, you should have received an e-mail with your time slot.  The groups' original plan was to cover the entire surgery, but you surpassed that and extra slots were added to overflow into the recovery period as well!  God is Good!!!  Also, thanks to the many people we know who are committed to praying for us on their own.  OK, no longer having a problem with the tears.  

Now to some more good news... maybe not quite as great as the recliner but.... we FIXED the comment box so you should now be able to leave posts.  :)  I'll be reading them to Jeff later on tonight and throughout his recovery process.  

So here we go.... let's bring on the next chapter!

God is Good!!!!!   All the Time!!!!!!


-Stacy and Jeff


Saturday, January 14, 2012

Operation Pray Jeff Thru

It's hard to believe.  We have been here one week and Jeff has yet to get kicked off the cardiac floor and moved to pediatrics.

We will be checking in with you tomorrow but wanted to take time to let you know about an essential part of Jeff's surgery and recovery. "Operation Pray Jeff Thru" has been established by friends of ours.   Many have asked how you can help and at this time, this is the most important thing you can do for Jeff.  This will give you the opportunity, no matter how far away you live, to assist us in the greatest way we know how.   The group coordinating this event sent out the following message for instructions on how you can be involved:

"As many of you may know, Jeff Curtis is scheduled for open heart surgery on Monday morning.  If you would like to be involved in praying for Jeff and his family, you are invited to sign up for a ten minute time slot.  The surgery is scheduled to begin around 7 a.m. and they are estimating that it will last about six hours.  We would love to cover the ENTIRE surgery in prayer and need your help.  
Please E-MAIL prayjeffthru@yahoo.com to let us know you are willing.  We will post (via the Curtis blog) the final schedule late Sunday afternoon. 
Thank you in advance for joining us...may God truly be glorified!
'Are you hurting? Pray...Believing prayer will heal you, and Jesus will put you on your feet.'  James 4"

The amazing thing about talking to God is that you can talk to him from anywhere.  HOWEVER, if you know there is a time that won't be optimal (i.e.. you are giving a presentation, having a colorectal exam (OK, that was Jeff influenced), have a meeting, etc.) please let the group know when e-mailing them.  ;)

Also, many of you have also asked about visiting.  I am going to be gone from the hospital this morning, running errands and tying up loose ends left dangling when we fled the house.  As I started to write this blog entry today, it was an eery feeling knowing it was a week ago (almost to the exact minute) that Jeff had the 1st heart attack.  I hope to have everything done by late afternoon, so I can give Jeff my undivided attention and focus.  Starting later this afternoon, we are going to let Jeff have time with just the kids.  We have tentatively "reserved" sets of time when each child can have their own private visits with their dad for tonight and tomorrow.  Therefore, we are asking there be no visitors starting later this afternoon and tomorrow to allow Jeff this time.

We are so thankful for each one of you!  We will be updating you tomorrow afternoon prior to surgery.  :)

God is Good!!!!!!  ALL the time!!!!!

-Stacy

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Beans Don't Burn on the Grill

Greetings from our deluxe apartment in the sky!  It has been decided Jeff will be having surgery Monday morning.  Until that time, we will be living the high life on the 6th floor of the hospital.  It is important that Jeff is constantly and closely monitored.   The days have been filled with tests, tests and more tests.  In addition, we have been busy making decisions and working on tying up loose ends in preparation for Monday.

Life here isn't all too bad.  EVERY staff member we have came into contact is extremely FRIENDLY and consistently goes the extra mile.   Jeff has made some great friends with many of the staff.... the nurses, housekeeping, techs and even those that bring him his food.  And speaking of hospital food... we LOVE it!  No, seriously, we LOVE the food.  Dare I say Jeff is actually starting to enjoy it here?!  Don't get us wrong, if we had the choice, we'd be busting Jeff out of here, even if it involved parachutes.  But we don't have the choice to go home.  Therefore, we are focusing on what we can choose.  We CAN CHOOSE to make the best of our days here until surgery and decided to make this our home sweet (fun, happy, God honoring) home.

Jeff's spirits are great.  He has been having some discomfort and fatigue but otherwise, feels good.  A pressing concern when he was admitted to the hospital was, "Do they get Fox Sports Midwest?"  The answer is "Yes", which means he has not missed a single St. Louis Blues game.  Since being here, the Blues are undefeated.  Tomorrow night, he has a special night planned with Brayden watching the hockey game together.   I think Brayden has some surprise decorations planned for their Blues watching party.  :-)

I had "the moment" of breakdown yesterday.  Word to the wise.  If you are in emotional distress, DO NOT turn your iPod to SHUFFLE.   I think they should have warning labels like they do for movies but instead of rating the age appropriateness they should have "emotional state" appropriateness of songs:
           'H' = Happy, 'IL' = In Love, 'NE' = Need Energy, 'SB' = Spiritual Boost, 'YWC' = You Will Cry.
Since I hadn't been sleeping well, I cranked up the volume for what I was hoping was a good 'NE' song to jump start the day.   But God knew that it wasn't energy that I needed.  Instead, I needed to get out all the emotions I had been holding inside.    My friends know that I have a crying disorder (Jeff calls it "crying constipation").  The past few days had been one of those times.  I knew it would feel better to cry but I just couldn't.  That is.... until the music played.  A few months ago, I was having a bad day and as "New Day" by Robbie Seay Band was playing, Jeff yanked me out of the chair and in a lighthearted, silly-way, danced with me on the wooden floor.  The memory of that moment vividly flooded back to me as soon as the first note came out of the speakers.....with it came the flood of tears.  I can't begin to describe how much lighter I felt after that cry.  How much stronger I felt.  It was another example of how what I thought I needed was much different than what God KNEW I needed.

Click here if you want to listen to New Day by Robbie Seay Band  (Just a suggestion... it sounds best at high volume and if you are Deb Knoles, please go get some kleenex first)

We continue to feel your prayers.  We continue to read each and everyone of your words of encouragement.  Thank you for sharing uplifting scripture and songs.  We are both blessed to have such caring co-workers, friends and family.  We are feeling your prayers from across many states.  I know I have said this all before but it is worth repeating how much those words and prayers mean to us and how overwhelmed we are by your acts of kindness.

God is Good!!!!!   ALL the time!!!!!!!

-Stacy AND....special remarks by Jeff ;)

Monday, January 9, 2012

Baby Let the Games Begin

It has been a rather long day of waiting, wondering what life would look like a week from now and waiting for the surgeon to tell us what lies ahead. It was hard to not be able to mentally prepare since we didn't fully know what we were up against. We had been told surgery would be in days and we'd been told Jeff would get to go home for a month before having surgery.

Our moment of enlightenment occurred late this afternoon. Jeff will be having open heart surgery as soon as possible (most likely 5-7 days). The date is still not decided upon as they have more safety issues to consider. Jeff's heart needs some time to heal from the trauma of what we discovered was 2 major heart attacks on Saturday. However, waiting more than a week is not optimal. Also, the risks for complications during surgery and the days following are higher for Jeff. It was also revealed to us that Jeff's current heart condition was more involved than we realized. There are 3 main arteries providing blood to your heart. Jeff had 100% blockage in one, 90% in another and then 80% in the 3rd. We knew of the presence of multiple blockages but not the extent of the damage done including the length of blockage in the artery and multiple ulcerations in the vascular tissue. At least 5 by-pass grafts will be needed.

We learned the long term life of the grafts were a lot shorter than we realized (12-15 years). Most concerning to the doctor was that Jeff has no risk factors that are usually seen with this condition (his cholesterol was good, he lives a healthy lifestyle). That leaves to question how to prevent further damage down the road.

At this moment, we are needing time to absorb all that was just thrown at us. As I type this, Jeff is already undergoing tests and we were told to expect more throughout the evening. I think for us the reality and seriousness of the situation is beginning to settle in, but we are relieved we have a clearer picture of what to expect. The surgeon, Dr. Christy, did a phenomenal job explaining everything to us and was in no hurry to leave the room. We feel safe in God's hands.

As soon as we were alone in the room, I will admit my head was SPINNING and Jeff could sense it right away. He grabbed my hand tight and said "This is God's will. We are going to follow along and great things are in store. He has picked us for this trial and just imagine how strong we will be at the end. This is just a bump in the road babe, just a bump in the road."

All Your ways are good
All Your ways are sure
I will trust in You alone
Higher than my side
High above my life
I will trust in You alone

Where You go, I'll go
Where You stay, I'll stay
When You move, I'll move
I will follow You
Who You love, I'll love
How You serve I'll serve
If this life I lose, I will follow You

Light unto the world
Light unto my life
I will live for You alone
You're the one I seek
Knowing I will find
All I need in You alone

In You there's LIFE EVERLASTING
In You there's FREEDOM for my soul
In you there's JOY, UNENDING JOY
and Jeff and I will follow

"I Will Follow" - Chris Tomlin

GOD IS GOOD!!!

-Stacy

Sunday, January 8, 2012

The beginning of the journey

On Saturday January 7th, Jeff was woken up by chest pain and knew something was wrong.  He turned to wake me up and let me know what was going on and I, like the impeccable health care worker I am, rushed to his aid.....OK.... well, I didn't EXACTLY rush.    I kinda mumbled something like, "Are you sure?  Cause' it is really early, it's Saturday and I'm so tired."  I would like to throw the disclaimer that I don't believe I was fully conscious when I uttered that, because I'm pretty sure if I was more awake, then I would have said, "just go throw an ice pack on it and you'll be fine."

In a matter of seconds, I was wide awake, still slightly in denial and nervously dialing 911. Then it all seemed a blur.  Thankfully, my parents don't live far away and arrived before the fire truck and ambulance and were able to take over since my brain was not working.  Kenzie was asleep but Brayden was in the living room.  I explained he would be hearing sirens and asked him to go hang out in his room awhile because I didn't want the presence of the emergency crews working on Jeff to scare him.  He was amazingly calm and said, "no problem Mom."

There is something surreal about hearing sirens in the distance and knowing they are coming for your family member.  We were blessed to have a phenomenal team of medical professionals working that day.  It was quickly confirmed Jeff was having a heart attack.  At Memorial, they have a program called STAR 80, which means they have a goal to get the blocked artery open within 80 minutes of arrival.  This was definitely the case with Jeff, a stent was put in quickly and I was relieved to see Jeff as he was being wheeled to his room.

We were told by the surgeon, that Jeff was extremely "lucky"... but we prefer the term "blessed", as we know it was not luck, but instead God's hands and the prayers of many that guided everyone that morning.  Jeff had 100% blockage in one of his arteries and the stent was used to open it up.  Time was critical and we were fortunate to live close to excellent cardiac care.  The surgeon explained that these types of blockages need to be treated within in hours for survival.  He told us Jeff had additional blockage in more arteries and open heart surgery will be needed soon.

After being back in his room for an hour, the pain returned with the same intensity.  He was rushed back to surgery where it was discovered he had a blood clot in the new stent.  They were able to remove as much of the clot as they could and placed an additional stint to decrease the likelihood of it occurring again.  The surgeon told us the next 24 hours were critical as his chance for another blood clot increased after experiencing the 1st one.

It was suggested I stay over night.  The nurse offered me a recliner.  (Note:  they use the word "recliner" loosely in hospitals, apparently they didn't mean a Lazy Boy).  It's a well known fact that we love having family sleepovers, but this one was a tad different.  I didn't end up sleeping that night and Jeff didn't get much either.  We couldn't help but question any slight bit of pain that returned, wondering if it was going to get worse, wondering if it would be another clot.  Yet, through it all, there was this sense of peace.  We later learned of all the people who had been praying for Jeff and our family.  People who were praying with a passion and dedication by lifting us up fervently and intentionally.  We did not have access to Internet for some time and were so in awe of all the encouragement we had been receiving via e-mails, facebook, etc.   Never for a second underestimate the strength a simple sentence can bring someone.  The outpouring of offers to assist and love on our family has shown us just how great of God we serve as he uses so many to be his hands and feet in our time of need.  Words can never express how truly grateful we are for all of your expressions of caring and concern.   My deepest apologies that we didn't have the ability to contact you sooner and know some of you may just be finding out this news as you read this blog.  We now have access back to our phones and the world wide web so please keep your messages coming, Jeff reads EVERY one and it truly lifts our spirits.

The next chapter is not known yet.  They have 2 options and are meeting together as a team to decide which is the safest.   We do know he will be having an open heart surgery to perform a coronary artery bypass graft(s).  We do not know when.  Please pray for wisdom for the doctors as they meet and make their decision.  Pray for the clots to STAY AWAY.  Pray for sleep (if you want try for the hail mary and throw in a prayer for a Lazy Boy - I'll leave that up to you).  Pray for Brayden and Kenzie, as I know they are trying hard to process all of the new information coming at them.  Most importantly, through all this, pray that everyone involved will never loose sight of what an AMAZING and AWESOME God we serve and He makes no mistakes, He chooses what is best and everything is for a far greater purpose than we understand until we reach heaven.  Thanks for choosing to come on this journey with us for the next couple months.  I can't promise this will be updated often, but I will definitely try my best to keep everyone who cares so much about Jeff informed of the his progress and the course of treatment.

GOD IS GOOD!

-Stacy